i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize