I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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