Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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