Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
