Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
