The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
