This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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