Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize