hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
