He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
