Do vagina's smell?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
