is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
