So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
