dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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