:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
