So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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