So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
