Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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