What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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