i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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