Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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