Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
pop tarts are not kleenex
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
