perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
