if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
