I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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