i can't believe i had my finger in that
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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