You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
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