i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
