I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
