Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize