idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize