Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
