WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize