He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Randomize
