hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
