well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Everything about him screamed your future.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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