just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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