how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize
