i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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