your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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