Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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