I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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