How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
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