how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Can vaginas get frostbite?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
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