hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
