these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
