If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize