I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize