I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
