So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize