Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
